Ayumi Hamasaki Sekai - Bist 2024.06

Q: About a year has passed since the 25th anniversary. Ayu's first 47-prefecture tour "ayumi hamasaki 25th Anniversary Live Tour" is running out (the interview was in mid-February). What are your candid thoughts so far?
A: I think we performers, staff, and guests are all the same...we won't let ourselves think too much until the whole live is over.

Q: Are you more focused on the things in front of you? Is this also the source of strength for your career that has never stopped in the 25 years since your debut?
A: Actually, I haven’t thought about it seriously.
Looking back, I didn't do it with the belief that "I won't take a break no matter what and I must persist until the end." Of course, the presence of my fans who have always supported me is very important. But in order to repay these fans, it is thanks to "the strength of this team that supports me that I can continue." In fact, I feel this power every day.
Therefore, when there are so many people working hard, you cannot take a break just because you want to. When I first debuted, I was just a kid, so I was just happy because I could go to various places with the staff (laughs). However, when I began to feel that everyone is using their own lives and treating work with a professional attitude, the kind of doing or not doing something based on my own mood became more difficult.

Q: When did you first realize that "Ayumi Hamasaki" was a big project involving many people?
A: Probably when I was in my early 20s. I suffered from sudden deafness and had to be hospitalized, so I postponed the performance. The scene caused by that postponement made me realize that if I canceled the stage due to accident, illness, injury, etc., everyone's situation would become worse. How tough. After witnessing this situation with my own eyes, I thought I would never rest again, or that I would become unable to rest.

Q: It was when you just turned 20. It’s amazing to have such self-awareness at such a young age.
A: It’s not so much self-consciousness as it is fear…well, maybe all I feel is fear.

Q: Have you switched ON and OFF modes? Is it relaxing mode at home?
A: I won’t dress too sloppily at home. Because my sons will see it. They all know that their mother is having a concert and I didn't want them to think that they actually had two mothers. But I don’t wear dresses at home (laughs).

Q: Do your kids already have the concept of "Mom is a very powerful diva"?
A: I also told them, "Mom's job is to be ayu".

Q: How do you find time for skin care?
A: Now after taking a bath, I apply what's left after smearing it on the kids's faces on myself. In the past, when I took a bath, I spent a lot of time taking care of even the back of my feet to make them sparkling. Now I don’t even apply cream that smells good. When taking a bath, toys would fly around, and I would step on them, "It hurts so much!" (laughing). I used to enjoy bubble baths, but now, there are scary toys floating in the bathtub, such as gorillas and sharks.

Q: The bubble bath turned into a gorilla shark bath?
A:Yes. However, even in that situation, I want to take good care of my mood. If you don't even care about your own affairs, your heart will become a little barren... It doesn't matter even just a little bit. Let go and do what you want to do. I think this will enrich your soul. After all, there's more to my identity than just being someone's mom. I also want to continue to be myself as a woman.

Q: How do you maintain your figure?
A: To be honest, after giving birth to two children at this age, I am really fighting and working hard! (laugh)

Q: How have you changed since the birth of your children?
A: I think my way of thinking and living have become a completely different person. Because before that I had been living like a vampire (laughs).

Q: Vampire? Do you feel like you're going to die when you see the sunrise?
A: That’s indeed the feeling. I lived a life where if I opened the curtains I felt like I was going to die.
I didn’t want even a millimeter of sunlight to reach me, so I tried my best to make my home perfectly blackout. Because I like dark environments, I usually don’t even turn on the lights. If I can’t see, I rely on candlelight (laughs). I have lived like this for more than 20 years.
But now I only have a thin curtain and can clearly see when the sun rises.
I can't believe such a big change has happened to me. When I was alone, my dinner time was around 11 o'clock in the evening.

Q: 11 o'clock in the evening? !
A: Yes, I have been living this kind of life before I had children, but now 23 o'clock is already midnight for me (laughs). I have dinner with the children around 17:00 or 18:00, and I get up at 6:00 or 7:00 every morning. After breakfast I put my two sons into uniform. The uniform looks so cute and I’m very happy.

Q: What do you mainly cook for breakfast?
A: My children eat very simply, and they like sesame salt rice, natto, and miso soup. Once, when the staff took them to the restaurant, the eldest son also said, "I want to eat sesame and salt rice" (laughs). The younger son eats everything. Recently I became obsessed with fast food videos on YouTube.
It’s just that we almost don’t eat meat at home, mostly grilled fish or sashimi. So my kids, even though they are very young, eat fish regularly.

Q: I heard that one of the reasons why you decided to hold a 47-prefecture tour was the change in the stage of your life?
A: The age of my fans is also growing with me. A person can use his time and money for his own use. But after starting a family, and of course I am the same, it becomes relatively difficult to create your own time. If it were in the past, people who wanted to come to my concert could just hop on the Shinkansen immediately after get off work, or go back without sleeping after the concert. However, now I think there are more people who can’t do it. From this perspective, it’s more like “thank you for being my fans and supporting me” than expressing my gratitude so far. I thought if we could go to everyone’s side and convey our gratitude, Well, this is the occasion for this tour.

Q: Do you think you'll be exhausted after the tour?
A: To be honest, I really think I should take a rest. But there are still many, many offers coming in (laughs), so I’m very grateful.
I feel like I've missed a bit of a break now.

Q:Are you happy about this?
A: If there are people who would be happy about it, I would want to do it for them. If necessary, I want to take care of everything as much as possible.

Q: At the end. What do you think is the difference between Ayumi Hamasaki in everyone's eyes and the real Ayumi Hamasaki? How can we get closer to "her"?
A: I don’t think there’s much difference in terms of mentality.
Maybe I haven't realized it yet, but people passing by me are saying "Ah, it's Ayu." I'm used to this kind of situation. Many people are working hard to create it. I really don't want the "ayu" thing to be ruined because of my usual careless state, so I always want to be strict with myself.

Q: You work as an ayu 24 hours a day.
A: Maybe so.
The so-called "Ayumi Hamasaki" and being a mother are different identities.
I have always lived with the "ayu" mood. This is something that cannot be changed in the future. For the fans who support "ayu", I think this is the right way.