[sugarbasil]

Originally Posted by henrydawg87

I am happy for Lico. Congratulations to her.

At first, I was hesitant about posting in this thread.

I am transgender.

I think the only thing you can do for a transgender person is be supportive and try to understand the person. I think what is both amazing and frustrating about being “transgender” is that there is no single “definition” of what transgender means. It really depends on the person, and when in doubt, respectfully ask.

I think when people say, “She looks like a man,” that’s just a superficial and unfair way of denying who a transgender person is. I think it disregards the difficult decision a transgender person has to make. It completely discounts the fact that, when a transgender person transitions, he or she is also inviting discrimination and ignorance upon him- or herself.

Moreover, the decision to transition depends on money. It costs a lot of money. Some transgender people, whether they like it or not, have to watch their bodies mature in ways they don’t want—simply because they can’t afford to do anything about it. I’m not saying this what happened in Lico’s case, but I think it’s what a lot of people don’t realize. So to point out that “she looks like a man” completely misses the point.

I guess people who make those comments assume they know what a “man” and “woman” looks like. Ken and Barbie, right? What’s really sad is the “she looks like a man” comment is an everyday occurrence.

Biologically speaking, society decided that there would only be man and woman. Doctors are the ones who decide whether the baby is a “boy” or a “girl.” But what happens when the doctor decides that the genitalia is “too small” to be a boy (like Ken) or that it is “too big” to be a girl (like Barbie)? Most times, the doctor will just operate and “fix” the “problem.” I don’t see how a doctor and his or her subjective opinion should control the future of a child. What if a doctor guesses—literally—incorrectly? Poor child.

Honestly, it just boils down to how a person responds to people who are “different,” whether it is race, religion, sex, gender, sexual orientation. Whatever. I would hope that anyone’s reaction involves respect and understanding. If not, then I guess that just reveals what type of person you really are.

Thank you for sharing your experiences with us. I know you said you were hesitant, but I think we can all learn a lot from your post, so thank you.

I know there have been cases of people who's genitalia was surgically altered at birth with really bad results. I actually think, if I recall correctly, that there's a study out there that shows that in the vast majority of cases, it ends up making the person's life horrible. I know there was the John/Joan case not too long back...that poor man. I feel so bad that people have been put in these positions.