Hikki has finally posted a word on her official site about her mom's passing. It was in japanese though. However in my limited Japanese, i tried my best to translate it. I nearly cried. It seems her relationship with her mom wasn't pretty good over the past few years but her love to her remains intact. Here's my translation.
Quote:
On the morning of the 22nd day of August, my mother had ended her life.
And because various speculations had arise here and there, let me speak a little here.
For a long time, my mom has been suffering with mental illness. Her own will to undergo treatment immediately was qualititavely difficult. And even as a family member, we were always woried about what we could do, what could be the best thing that we could do for her sake.
From a very young age, my mom's illness has always been progressing. With the symptoms worsening along with the family, her distrust towards people grew. The difference between reality and delusion for her has become vague. She lost her emotional strength and behavioral control. And me, just always being toyed with, couldn't do anything.
Our prayer/wish that my mom be set free from the pain she has been feeling for many years has faced an opposite direction. Her last deed was too sad, just grows more painful with sense of regrets.
She was the one who always gets missunderstood however, is always tend to be afraind inspite of the fact that she's aggresive, always overflowing with sense of righteousness, and the one who loves to smile. The things on her mind moves fast, like a child who's urges are dangerous. Carelessly free; just the sweetest person than anyone else. Sad memories are many, but whenever I think about my mom, in my heart, the only thing that floats and rises above all is her smiling face.
Being her daughter makes me feel so proud. I am overflowing with sense of gratitude by meeting her.
Recieving a lot of warm messages from everyone, I feel that i am supported/rescued by a lot of people. Thank you so much.
2013.08.26
Utada Hikaru
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Anyone please feel free to correct me if
there are errors. The original japanese text is on her site.