Ayu possibly leaving Twitter? (her Twitter is now a staff account)

[rikku1994]

Originally Posted by Delicious n Bold

Off topic but this is why Cher's Twitter is probably one of the better celebrity twitters ever.

Could you imagine if ayu tweeted like cher and just spoke freely?
"What did you do on Kumi's birthday?"
"I got a colonic."

GOD I WOULD LOVE IT IF AYU STARTS TWEETING LIKE CHER.

[Delirium-Zer0]

lol woooooow this thread XD

Andrenekoi, you're a freaking badass for being able to tell the difference between real and invented oppression. Thank you for bringing some degree of sanity to this thread.

How many words in here only have power because people have decided to be powerless in the face of them? Oh, yeah, like.... most of them.

You wanna call me a slut? Absofuckinglutely I'm a slut. I very much enjoy having sex. And I am proud of that fact. I know plenty of men who are sluts also, and more power to them! I know a lot of men and women who aren't sluts also. And more power to them as well.

If someone calls you a slut, your response should ALWAYS be "yeah, and?" because it means NOTHING about your character. It ONLY has power as a rude, degrading, mean thing to say if you let it.

FOR GOODNESS' SAKE STOP LETTING WORDS HAVE POWER OVER YOUR EMOTIONS IF THEY DON'T INTRINSICALLY HAVE THAT POWER.

If someone says "your dog died," yes, be sad! But if someone calls you a slut? Psh. REFUSE to be knocked down by that shit. Look at what the word REALLY means. If it's accurate to you, freaking own it. If it's not accurate to you, just say "actually I'm not really all that into sex. Not really a sexual creature, you know? Wasn't ever really my thing." No yelling, no anger, no sadness, no hurt feelings. A woman doesn't become an object because someone pointed out that she enjoyed getting some. Unless you inherently believe a woman IS a lesser creature for being a slut (or a whore or whatever), why let it bother you?

Those slut walk ladies have the right idea.

I'm not gonna tell someone to brush it off if I call him or her a slut and it really bothers them. If they tell me not to call them that, I will stop. But I DO think that part of the fix for the problem needs to be on THEIR end too. THEIR mindset does still need to change so the word doesn't have the ability to so thoroughly emotionally arm-wrestle them.

Now, if someone accuses me of being a cruel, conniving bitch? Or of being manipulative or shallow or invasive or ANY other character trait I find truly disruptive & destructive, and which I try VERY hard not to be.... THAT shit is going to offend me. And I will take the gloves off to defend myself against words like that. Being a "slut" has no effect on anyone but myself, but if you tell me or anyone else that I'm cruel or manipulative, that's a flat-out lie and could seriously screw with my life & my friendships if too many people believe it. So yeah i'm gonna fight against accusations like that.

But "slut"? Hah! Bring it.

[xLuna&1LOVE]

I am sorry but what has all these things really to do with Ayu?
Whether I agree and disagree with some of you, this debate start to look more like a battle of the most opressed groups. Or who is having the most knowledge about it. Some are throwing arguments in the ring which are so fucking disturbing. And the irony is that no one is really coming across. And the only "foreign" comments which seem to be valid to this debate are those of the members who side with one of the camps. The discussion would made more sense if members did not twist the stories of others into very ugly accusations. This has blown way out of proportion. At some point it has to come to all of our senses that there has to come an end to this. Camp Adrenekoi will never side with camp Chibi Chan
You guys have way too much time in writing all these novel-length "points" you are making.
Relax. It is just a fan forum.

[Andrenekoi]

Originally Posted by xLuna&1LOVE

I am sorry but what has all these things really to do with Ayu?
Whether I agree and disagree with some of you, this debate start to look more like a battle of the most opressed groups. Or who is having the most knowledge about it. Some are throwing arguments in the ring which are so fucking disturbing. And the irony is that no one is really coming across. And the only "foreign" comments which seem to be valid to this debate are those of the members who side with one of the camps. The discussion would made more sense if members did not twist the stories of others into very ugly accusations. This has blown way out of proportion. At some point it has to come to all of our senses that there has to come an end to this. Camp Adrenekoi will never side with camp Chibi Chan
You guys have way too much time in writing all these novel-length "points" you are making.
Relax. It is just a fan forum.

yeap, we really did got far away from the thread subject.

[Chibi-Chan]

Originally Posted by Andrenekoi

^Equating rape jokes with the use of the word whore is insensitive to rape victims. You are getting a suffering whole larger than being called a whore (and the most I disagree with comparing suffering, this IS a fact) so you can shock people into agreeing with you. Again, very low.

Do me one favour, as a rape victim myself, don't speak for me and let me decide, which comparisons I find insensitive.
I whole heartedly agree with Lady Dynamitez because words matter. And using a language that is degrading to people leads to violence against them. Period. And considering that whore is one of the terms rape victims are constantly hearing from other people to put them down, you're the one being insensitive by using that word so lightly just because YOU don't see the problem. But let me guess, in your eyes I'm just "playing" victim again, right?

[lizzylovesongaku]

Honestly, guys. What's wrong with a little sensitivity? No one group of people should be deciding what is or what isn't offensive to another group of people. Words can hold power and they can cause damage and I think it's a little bit naive to say, "oh, just don't let it hold power of you and you'll be fine". I also think this is a very important discussion to have, but, that's all I'm gonna say because this topic has spun WAY off course. It's certainly interesting to read, though!

Ayu, man. She's great, isn't she? I heard something happened with her Twitter. Let's discuss.

[miru2590]

Originally Posted by Chibi-Chan

Do me one favour, as a rape victim myself, don't speak for me and let me decide, which comparisons I find insensitive.
I whole heartedly agree with Lady Dynamitez because words matter. And using a language that is degrading to people leads to violence against them. Period. And considering that whore is one of the terms rape victims are constantly hearing from other people to put them down, you're the one being insensitive by using that word so lightly just because YOU don't see the problem. But let me guess, in your eyes I'm just "playing" victim again, right?

I agree with you Hun. I'm also so sorry. I know people who have been through it.
This is the reason why people need to be careful with there words. Just because words don't have power over you you can't force others to feel or act how you want. Words have power like it or NOT. Writing like a college professor is not going to change the way a lot of us feel.

(Anyways I'm out let's get back to Ayu)

[Chibi-Chan]

^thank you, that's sweet of you. =)

[Andrenekoi]

Originally Posted by Chibi-Chan

Do me one favour, as a rape victim myself, don't speak for me and let me decide, which comparisons I find insensitive.
I whole heartedly agree with Lady Dynamitez because words matter. And using a language that is degrading to people leads to violence against them. Period. And considering that whore is one of the terms rape victims are constantly hearing from other people to put them down, you're the one being insensitive by using that word so lightly just because YOU don't see the problem. But let me guess, in your eyes I'm just "playing" victim again, right?

I'm sorry that you went through rape. That's a terrible experience that I wish no one and I hope you can recover from it on the best way possible. I had some experiences as a child envolving an adult and teenager boys (it never lead to penetration, even if one almost did) that were pretty... Complicated.

I still find comparing being called a name to being raped or being shamed for being raped (something rape jokes do) a shock value argument.

[DonkeyKongRemix]

Who would've known Ayu leaving twitter would cause such a stir!

*keeps editing post because I want to say more but then I become afraid of getting attacked*

[Andrenekoi]

^I think we should get back to the thread subject...

[DonkeyKongRemix]

Originally Posted by Andrenekoi

^I think we should get back to the thread subject...

That seems like a very safe and wonderful idea.

[Chibi-Chan]

Originally Posted by Andrenekoi

I'm sorry that you went through rape. That's a terrible experience that I wish no one and I hope you can recover from it on the best way possible. I had some experiences as a child envolving an adult (it never lead to penetration, but the adult intention was sexual never the less) that were pretty... Complicated.

I still find comparing being called a name to being raped or being shamed for being raped (something rape jokes do) a shock value argument.

Thank you. I'm surprised about you're reply but in a positive way. So really thank you. And of course I also hope you were able or will be able to recover the child abuse!

The problem with terms like "whore" is that it isn't just being called a name. Just being called a name would be something like "asshole". The term "whore" implicates a lot of things that are degrading to women. There are a lot of things which add to rape culture, rape jokes and names for women like whore are adding to rape culture too. Rape jokes adding to rape culture is far more obvious than calling women whores, that's why Lady Dynamitez was bringing this up. Lady Dynamitez's argument wasn't about comparing one to the other, it was about to link violent language against women to actual violence against women. Therefore also the N word argument. If white people (black people using it is a totally different thing of course) are using this word because they think "it's no big deal" they're also adding to a social climate in which violence against black people is acceptable. Same goes for words like "whore" for women. If people constantly use words like whore or bitch or slut to refer to women they add to a social climate in which (sexual) violence against women is acceptable, because women are constantly denied their humanity by degrading them verbally. It's much more easier to be violent against a person if it was made clear before that they aren't "human enough" to be treated with respect.
So Lady Dynamitez's post wasn't comparing being called a name to making fun about rape victims. It was about to make clear that constantly degrading women verbally and denying them being addressed respectfully leads to rape. And that isn't something Lady Dynamitez or I are making up, it's actually proven by science.
My rapist called me a whore and said I actually wanted the "attention". You see the link to "attention whore"? The thing is, statistically every 6th to 10th woman gets raped (depends on the statistic). A lot of these women can tell you the exact same thing like I did. I think there is a reason why rapists are calling their victims like that. And it's not like rapists are some kind of monsters everyone can easily identify as such. Most of them are perfectly normal men. So by using terms like "attention whore" you're adding to a violent language against women that denies us any respect and some guys sadly are motivated by that because they think we "deserve" or "want" (or both) to be raped and if we're unlucky enough to meet a guy like that, we end up being one out of the ten (or six) women.
That's why I don't care if some people use terms like whore "playfully". This carelessness may be funny for some, but others have to face the consequences. Not to mention that you never know if one of the women you're talking to or who are able to hear/read what you say may be one out of the ten women. What is the hardest about being raped isn't what happened, it's that you're reminded of it on a daily basis because people say all kinds of "funny" things that add to rape culture evey day and you're just standing there and have to pretend you don't care. Because it's not like you would ask people around you to stop saying those things 'cos it's not like you would want to know every person at university for example what happened.
So when I sometimes use the word "bitch" in a playfull and ironic way, I'm only doing this in private when I'm 120% sure no one besides me and my friend can hear it.
And I honestly don't think that it's too much asked for to not use terms that are degrading to people, because someone always has to face the consequenses of a social climate in which violence against certain groups of people is ok.