My 8 years with ayu...

[Melodie]

That's a mistake that many fans make.
They think that a celebrity belongs to them if they purchase their music.

[username]

um,seriously, I felt the same way
I was disappointed ayu got married at first so quickly, but it's her own life
I always admire her independent ways

[Miidoriness]

Originally Posted by ZXKira

My 8 years with ayu

The moment I got the news of her marriage, I just could not help crying. Though nearly one week has passed away, I could still remember that night, the first several hours of this new year. I was sitting in front of my laptop, pressing F5 button for her Twitter.

Though I know that she is already 32 years old, and I am really happy to see her smiling with her husband. But I still cannot accept this great change in both her life and my life, since she has already been an important part of my life.

I encountered one photo of her eight years ago in a newspaper of China. I thought "Wow this girl is cute. She looks just like a barbie girl." That day, I went to a CD shop nearby, and bought a casette tape of hers (in 2002, tapes were still popular among Chinese young people since a CD player was quite expensive). I can still remember that song: Voyage.
Upon the moment the melody of the intro hit my ears, I fell in love with that song that it remains one of my favourite ayu's songs till now.

This is my first time to be a fan of a star. And eight years have passed away, she still remains to be my favourite star. During the past eight years, I graduated from high school, got my bachelor's degree, and entered the graduate school. When I failed in the exams, her songs make me be confident again. Just as what she sings in SEASONS :" Kyou ga totemo kanashikute, Asu moshimo naiteitemo, Sonna hibimo attaneto, waraeru hi ga kurun darou..." Everytime I listen to SEASONS, I always feel a bright tomorrow is there waiting for me.
When I broke up with my EX, I turned to her songs. "You were..." makes me cry when I hear the lyrics of the chorus:" I once thought you were the last one for me. I once wanted to fall in love for the last time with you. What can I think of in such a cold night under the stars alone..." Nevertheless, she also encouraged me in "End roll": "Then I will start to move on. You will start to move on, too. Even if we will be apart ever since, light will shine for both of us..."

For the past eight years, you have been one of the most important part of my life. I could sing every song of yours though I don't quite know Japanese. I just cannot live without you.

Now that you said you have found the real love in your life. Just as one thread of a Japanese forum put:" We are not feeling bad towards her marriage. We just feel that she used to be ours, but she now belongs to that man..."
Maybe that is the feeling of every male fan of yours.

But I shall celebrate.
And I hope you will be happy with Manuel.

For me, I start to think that I may start to find my real love this year, and I wish I could succeed.

Oh wow~ I admire you >< You're such a big fan and I agree with you. Her news of getting marry was a shock not only for me but many people. I'm glad that you're not that type of people who have negative comment about her getting marry. I know that the news was surreal because when I first heard the news I thought this was a joke however it's not. I know she only knows Manuel for like 4 months or something and they already get marry... it was a rush but I, as a fan, support her decision ^^

[Miidoriness]

Originally Posted by Melodie

That's a mistake that many fans make.
They think that a celebrity belongs to them if they purchase their music.

LIKE! THUMBS UP!!! Man!! They should have that on this forum!!! >~<

[nikku76]

I can relate. I never felt as if I owned Ayu or anything like that. But she was my person, you know? That person I looked to for strength and related to her through her words and melodies. I saw a lot of myself in her. Her creative expressions are quite similar to what's in my own heart.

I've never been in love with her per se. I prefer men for starters. But there definitely was that mixture of adoration and admiration. And a little bit of that "I want to be her" feeling. (Though I didn't actually want to be her since I'm happy as a guy, just be as emotionally and artistically expressive as her.)

Someone said that people are upset that she will no longer be that solitary and lonely figure with a dark past anymore. And yeah, to some degree, I will miss that. Because I feel like that is still me.

That said: When I heard the news, I was elated. I cried tears of joy. I was and still am incredibly happy for her. When I saw that picture of her and Manny on the couch that someone snapped in LA, all I could do was smile real big and forget about everything bothering me in my own life. Anyone that knows me knows that is not typical of me. But this girl has been through a lot. She deserves happiness. Everyone does. And someday hopefully we will all have it too. Ayu found her angel and I encourage every single person that has been following in her shadow to keep searching for theirs. If she has taught us anything, it's not to give up.

[Polyrhythm]

what the.

[Piccolo]

By far one of the better first posts I've seen in a while, but I suspect this is not a new person lol.

[panda87]

that's sweet... but u were quite intensely, dramatically devoted to her. i know it may sound rude, but it sort of made me chuckle to see such a melodramatic post about ayu. but it's healthy to be honest, and thank you for sharing what you did with us. it's nice to know someone can have such a powerful grasp on someone else. but hey, not to sound cynical or the like, but for someone as unreachable as her, don't be so indulged in her to the point that your life is crippled, for lack of better term, by her own choices she makes. you are your center of life, not ayu :] i'm sure she'd say the same.

btw, ayumimylove, scrolling down, i almost choked on my drink b/c ur default picture is HILARIOUS. omg, had to mention it. sorry for being off-topic for those sensitive to such manners of being, kekekeke.